Nope, can’t read them:
Tuesdays with Morrie
Chicken Soup Books
Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus
Who Moved My Cheese
Embraced By the Light
Bridges of Madison County
Message in a Bottle
The Christmas Box
The Work and The Glory
YOU ARE SPECIAL
Care to convince me otherwise?
Thanks for being there for me over the years. I'd like to specifically thank you for making the Sunday stale bread in Austria taste great. Remember me, you and the bananas? Or the apples? Those were crazy times, yo. I think people underestimate you on whole wheat bread. I'm here to tell you that you can go for the whole grain gamut, really. I think it's great that you're made with skim milk, that cuts down on your fat content fo' shure.
Sometimes you came in these individual plastic serving sizes covered with foil INCLUDING a mini-spatula for spreading. Except, you know me and my siblings, we would just lick it--no spatula needed! (Although, seriously, thanks, because you could draw with that spatula--a delicious chocolate Zen garden--and then wipe the slate clean with a tongue.)
I went to Smith's Market Fresh Everyday Smith's once and they HAD those individual foil-wrapped servings. I'd never seen them before here, and I haven't seen them since. I talked the management into letting me buy the whole box to take you home to my brother and sisters. That was awesome.
I noticed something today:
You're made with OVER 50 Hazelnuts per jar? I wonder how they measure that out. "48, 49, 50, 51, 52---that's enough! We said over 50 not nearly 60. Don't want to get too crazy!" Do you think that the factory worker's hand gets tired plunking them into the jar one by one? You'd probably have to be ambidextrous to avoid carpal tunnel.
I can't believe that you have no artificial colors or preservatives! You're practically health food (good with granola too.)
I won't tell your secret. Ok, maybe I will. That "Do Not Refrigerate" totally doesn't apply if you intend to eat directly with a spoon. In fact, you, cold and solid, are a delightful treat!*
Your friend and snacking compatriot,
*Seriously, though, don't spread cold Nutella on bread because that's just a crumbly-messed up disaster waiting to happen.