Thursday, February 22, 2007

Stranges, Weirds, and Other True Confessions.

I don't always respond to tags, but thought I should try to be personally reflective. Don't ask me why I came to that conclusion. I know that I'm weird. I know that I'm strange. However, trying to pinpoint specific idiosyncrasies is quite the challenge. I even pressed some of my friends and my other half, "Come on, just tell me what's weird about me." What a loaded question!

1. Artificial colors freak me out. If a food is not naturally green or blue there is no way I am eating it. They just look awful. Yes, I know they probably taste the same, and no, I will not eat them. This strange goes back to elementary school and St. Patrick’s Day. Some of the moms (and they were all moms back then) were selected to bring in treats for holidays. One St. Paddy’s Day those treats included such items as green muffins, cookies, and MILK. Green MILK. I can’t bear the thought. Red velvet cakes, blue popsicles, festive frostings in a variety of colors, are all out. Awful stuff.

2. Open food containers like peanut butter should be free of all debris and as smooth as possible. The family across the street from us growing up had 8 kids and their house was always a wreck. I remember going over there and my friend fixing me a peanut butter sandwich. Embedded in the peanut butter AND the jelly were crumbs from other people’s sandwiches. DISGUSTING. To this day I can’t stand crumbs in a jar. It makes me want to hurl. Nutella, butter in a tub, and condiments, they must all look as clean and contaminant free as possible. When you take out a helping from these jars you must leave the top as smooth as possible. No gaping holes, no uneven surfaces.

3. I dislike many medications, but like using the correct terminology vs. brand names. Naproxen sodium is more fun to say than Aleve, acetaminophen way more fun than Tylenol. Ibuprofen, whatever the drug, I like the name and not the brand. I wish to learn more, just for fun.

4. I have writing crushes on these two men:

Allan Sloan

Sloan makes economic and Wall Street news hilarious and informative.

Seymour Hersh

Hersh is a living legend and arguably the best investigative journalist ever. They both write so well--with humor (the former) and conviction (the latter.) Sadly, they are not alone. I’ll often form intellectual crushes on people. I adore forming cerebral connections more than anything else. It feeds my soul.

5. Color arranging. If I have a collection of multicolored things in front of me, I must arrange them in a sequential and symmetric pattern by color. Take for instance Skittles: you could arrange a handful into red, yellow, two orange, a purple, two orange, yellow and then red. If there is a color that doesn’t fit the pattern (say one green) it must be eaten or discarded to meet symmetry. It’s preferable to eat the candy in a way that a pattern can be maintained, even if by constant reorganization. Poker chips, colored balloons, it can be any type of object in multiple form in front of me, they must all be arranged properly.

6. I am really bad at word puzzles of all kinds. It’s been said that Jeopardy! works because people feel smart if they get one right and conversely, Wheel of Fortune works because people always figure it out. It’s the opposite for me. Wheel of Fortune often stumps me. I can’t do crossword puzzles and I hate jumbles or searches of all kinds.


compulsive writer said...

That's the best excuse I've ever heard of to eat Skittles.

I understand about the open containers. I will go through as many knives as sandwhiches when preparing PBJs. Just not to cross contaminate.

b. said...

I'm with you on #2, and really with you on #5. And on your label...I feel very self involved when I answer meme challenges.

Rachel said...

I read 2 and 5 and thought, "Someone else knows my pain!!!" We must hold hands as soon as is humanly possible.

kristenlibrarian said...

I too am obsessed with #2 & #5. I HATE crumbs in the butter and butter in the jelly and jelly in the peanutbutter! HATE IT!

I always must arrange my M&M's by color, then if there are any odd numbers I must eat those so everything will be even. I swear I do not have OCD. Really, I don't.

metamorphose said...

Haha! So there with #2 as well! I also admit that I'm not so great with #6. This is hard for me to admit since I am an English Major, and people expect me to be so handy with such things. Tis not so.

April said...

I hate the crumb thing, too. I also can't have food on my plate touching. I won't eat it. I don't care if it "all ends up in the same place."

Btw, Best of Cheri Oteri? NO cat lady sketches!!! Isn't that a crime?

La Yen said...

I had a friend that was playing along with Wheel t home and said the following "'_alt Lake City?' Buy a vowel!!!"
Was that you?

liz said...

omigosh i laughed out loud at the writing crushes/ photos! you are hilarious.

it's like having a crush on woody allen.

Emmelyn said...

Regarding Number 6: how are you at Scrabble or Boggle? I love both games, and am pretty good at them, but those puzzles where there's a phrase with the letters all scrambled up, and you have to figure it out? That is my idea of hell.

~j. said...

I always buy a big container of Not Butter at Costco, and transfer it to the li'l container in my fridge, refilling as needed, and I thoroughly wash li'l container EACH TIME to avoid any crumb-spillage that may have occurred.

No, la yen, that was me, and it happened like this:

S_lt L_ke City

I COULD NOT figure it out.

Queen Scarlett said...

Will you be my neighbor?

I totally am with you on 1, 2, 5, 6.

sue-donym said...

I am having trouble thinking that you are bad at word puzzles. It just doesn't fit.

I love saying acetaminophen.

Sarah said...

The most disturbing scene from any movie ever made is in Hook where the Lost Boys all sit around and eat piles and piles of rainbow colored goop from huge piles in the center of the table. It makes my stomach queasy just thinking about it.

The open food container one is great too - I'm glad I'm not the only one who smooths the tops of the peanut butter after helping myself.

luckyzmom said...

Me too #5.