**This post updated throughout the day
I heard the baby crying this morning as I was waking up. They brought him to me in bed. This time, however, my baby was a 25 year old Peruvian man on the shorter side with a serious 5 o’clock shadow. I tried to make sense of this in my head. “This is your baby and you need to nurse him,” they said. I tried to lay the Peruvian across my lap to nurse, but he dwarfed the Boppy. “But if this is my baby,” I said to them, “Why do I still hear my baby crying?” I decided to shake the Peruvian off and go find my real baby. It’s a good thing, too, because my baby was still in his crib crying his heart out. I knew that there had been something all wrong about that Peruvian
"Pop star Jessica Simpson has shocked fans by confirming her romance with rocker John Mayer is over. After Simpson attended the Cannes Film Festival solo earlier his week, rumors were rife that the couple's nine-month romance had cooled. And now news show Extra is reporting the split is official. " source.
No, no, no. We were SHOCKED that they got together. We were SHOCKED that they continued dating each other. However, we were NOT shocked that they broke up. Any one shocked out there? Didn't think so.
Lisha calls to say that instead of Chicago, she's heading to Honduras for Memorial Day weekend. AWESOME, is what I say. Then I read her the State Department travel advisory for Honduras. She asks if she should tell mom that she's going. We both vote NO. Instead, she's going to send an email to notify dad and ask him not to tell mom. Papa is good like that: he supports adventures 100%. La professora only supports adventures 14%, on a good day.
REDACTED. Other Half asks me to remove this item for now.
Bedtime. I announce to El Guille that he is going to bed. He runs from me yelling, "I hide, I'm hiding, I'm hiding. I'm hiding in the kitchen." I don't have the heart to tell him that a.) announcing that you're going to go hide and b.) telling us the location of your hiding place isn't the best strategy.
I made Other Half's favorite to celebrate **redacted**, Pie: from scratch Coconut Cream.
I've never had a decent coconut cream pie that wasn't homemade. I just don't think you can duplicate it in a commercial setting and have it turn out halfway decent.
"JOHANNESBURG (Reuters) - Over 1,000 pregnant women in South Africa set a
new world record Saturday for the largest gathering of women due to give birth -- and there were no early arrivals...The event needed only 100 pregnant women to set the record, but attracted 1,146 which was verified by independent adjudicators to enter the Guinness Book of World Records." source.
I can't help but think we could break this record on any Saturday of the month at a mall around here. I bet we could break this record simply by having the Guiness Book show up to BYU devotional.
Kiki and I are chatting. She wants a piece of pie. I tell her to think positively and make a wish. No dice; she is pie-less still.
I knew The Secret was crap.
My friend Dave wrote the best post about how growing up in Utah we were always in the shadow of California. I love his blog. We went to elementary, junior high, and high school together. He takes me right back to those days--he's a great storyteller. Some time you should go read this classic, it might be my favorite blog post ever. Everytime I need to laugh I go read it. Are there any blog posts that are your go-tos when you need a laugh?
And now I'm just stalling so I don't have to go to bed.