jetsetgreen

Wednesday, July 04, 2007

We happen to live just a couple blocks from one of the largest fireworks shows in the Western US. The gigantic booms, nearly sonic in their intensity, shake our windowpanes and rattle the china. I’m hoping they don’t rattle Proximo this year. El Guille has always been impressed by fireworks. Other Half has always been rather bored of them. I, on the other hand, have always been a little frightened of fireworks.


I read a book in the 3rd grade about a kid who went blind from playing with fireworks and he got a really cool Seeing Eye dog that was fidelity incarnate. I never quite got past the ‘blind from playing with fireworks’ part. I like the professional displays, especially when that boom sinks into your chest and resonates with your heartbeat. However, when kids start pulling out the mega packages and the matches, I get a little spooked. Considering that every year there are half a dozen wild fires in my area of the woods alone due to fireworks, I get even more spooked.

One year, Other Half and his friend were setting off a bunch of fireworks right next to an open, bone-dry field. The field was adjacent to multi-million dollar homes. S-M-E-R-T. His stupid friends had brought stupid illegal flying fireworks. My blood pressure was sky high for 2 hours; the palpitations had to have been visible. Nothing happened, which I was slightly disappointed about. I kind of WANTED a fire to start in the field so they’d knock off lighting things on fire. It would have shown them. Maybe I wouldn’t have to participate in another pyromaniac’s delight the next year. I guess I’m happy the field didn’t catch fire; they make you pay for the cost of fighting the fire if you start it. I would have hated that. Who wants to spend money you could have spent on shoes, or baguettes, fixing some over grown Boy Scouts’ mistake? Not I!

So right now we’re inside, waiting for the fireworks to start. El Guille has brought all the kitchen chairs into the living room and is leaping in his Lightening McQueen undies from chair to chair, to coffee table to chair, to couch. It’s like I’ve never read him about monkeys jumping on the bed, and I HAVE, twice a night every night for the past three months. I guess he took it as instructional rather than cautionary. He’s also flapping his arms like bird wings as he jumps. It serves me right for letting him watch Winged Migration. Next time he can go back to watching Faces of Death 2 like a normal three-year-old.

Tiff-fi-fay just showed up with her girls and sparklers. Sparklers. I think I can deal with that. Happy Independence Day, America! Let's go blow stuff up.

15 comments:

Leisha said...

I share your fear of fireworks. My uncle blew off his thumb with firecrackers as a child. Can't get past that. And not to add to your fear of fireworks, but my little (almost 4 year old) girl dropped some ashes from her sparkler tonight and got a 2nd degree burn on her foot! I thought I was getting the most benign of offerings from our fireworks stand? Next year poppers, and that's it! Happy 4th from a semi-new reader!

miggy said...

I used to live in western Nebraska and let me tell you, those folks don't mess around when it comes to fireworks. There's a guy in my grandparents ward who runs a fireworks store (think grocery store with shopping carts and aisles and aisles of fireworks) and he makes most of his living off selling fireworks 3 weeks a year. You will see people whose kids are in a diaper with no other clothes or shoes on, but they have a grocery cart filled with about $500 of fireworks. It's insane . . . and you can actually buy the big mortor shells that are used at big firework shows. . . yeah they kinda scare me too.

~j. said...

Neighbors got a visit from a firetruck. A firetruck. And a fine: $1,000 for each illegal firework.

oooooops.

(I didn't realize firefighters had the authority to issue fines.)

kiki said...

FIREWORKS!!! I'm a huge pyro, so I LOVES the fireworks. Two years ago, I was taking physics labs with a friend. We were working with circuits, and we thought that we should take this learning home with us. So we got some wires and batteries and switches and a cup full of M80s, and we set it all up to explode in the dog food bowl every time a bunch of birds started huddling around it. It was fun and funny.

Queen Scarlett said...

I've been to that Stadium of Fire thing-y...it was fun...but I'm like you about the fireworks...I sat there wondering what I should do if a firework came too close to the eyeballs. ;-)

We also have to remind Kalea about what happened to those monkey's when she decides to contemporary dance on our bed.

Melody said...

Our family goes to the "stadium on fire" every few years. Last night I left with ashes all over me. I think I'll skip it next year.

I love fireworks, I have to admit it, but I think watching terds floating around the bathroom sink can be exciting too... that was one of the funniest things I have EVER read!

Melody said...

oops, I guess I mean "turd"... what can I say? It's been a long day of not using my brain at all.

Em said...

Stadium of FIRE!

AzĂșcar said...

It's right up there with SMITH's marketfresheveryday SMITH's.

Lucky Red Hen said...

We can see 5 cities fireworks from our living room. It's lovely not to have my ears deef or worry about mosquitoes. I also have a trepidation towards fireworks... you never know.

Engineer: martha corinna; Conductor: j. bradley; Restless Riders: norah corinna, lucia louise, j. abram; On the Caboose: tequila the foxdog said...

My 1st 4th of July in Utah my neighbors lit the Orem ledge above Provo on fire with illegal fireworks. They were visited by the firetrucks b/c a huge fire had to be put out. It was actually kind of exciting. I like a little stupidity drama sometimes.

sue-donym said...

I have the Stadium of Fire soundtrack if anyone is interested in borrowing it.
I get really cool gifts because of my cool job ya know.

Word Verification: qdorxxx (cutie or triple x)

compulsive writer said...

I think pyromania is genetically programed into the entire male species. And some tomboys, too.

Sparklers sent my daughter to the doc on one 4th. They can leave a nasty mark. Not that I let that stop anyone from having some fun.

sara said...

I luuuuuuv a good fireworks show. We had a couple close calls doing our "own" shows (illegal) when I was growing up, but nothing will stop me from going to a good "legal" show, every year!

fijiangirl said...

I just returned from Bend, OR. They have fireworks every year on the butte and every year the butte lights up with fire from the fireworks show. This year was no different. Right during the grand finale you hear fire engines driving up the mountain to put the fire out! Is seems the locals are disappionted if the butte doesn't catch on fire.