Wednesday, August 15, 2007


Tonight was leftovers night and I didn’t have to cook. So I baked!

When cjane came to dinner last week she brought homemade Oreos. They were so good I ate most of them right after she left. Only a few made it through the terrible ritual sacrifice to my belly that night. The bell tolled for the remainder by week’s end.
I wanted to make some of my own but didn’t have a recipe. I did some digging and found a recipe in one of my neglected cookbooks:
"Of course Azúcar owns that book," my friends are saying right this minute. And of course, they are right.

Why make your own Oreos when you can just buy them? Why not, that’s why. I don’t feel like putting on clothes to go to the store and pick up second rate shelf stock because it’s frakking hot.

Plus, what if you wanted to make one giant Oreo? It’s not like Nabisco is taking orders on Oreo sizes. Who are they to tell us what size the Oreos will come in? This isn't Cuba, Fidel! I made big ones and small ones. You heard me. Just for the hell of it I even made double stuff. I CONTROL the Oreos. I am the Oreo master.

Don’t they look tasty? They totally are.

I know that there are at least two of you out there right now that are thinking to yourselves, “Wow, some people are so talented and they have it so together. I should stop looking at some people’s blogs because they make me feel bad.”

Just in case looking at a pile of delicious, homemade Oreos hurts your feelings, may I interest you in a picture of my living room the way it is right now?


Don’t you feel superior that my house is a cluttered mess and I spent my night dinking around instead of cleaning as is my duty? Guess what, the clutter will still be there in the morning if I feel like cleaning it, mom! If I don’t feel like cleaning it, I can lie on the sofa and make El Guille do it for ‘character building.’ Character building is the best thing ever invented for lazy parents.

What? No. I’m not lazy, I make homemade Oreos. When the recipe said, "Drop by rounded teaspoons," I took my teaspoon and deliberately measured exact rounded portions! Lazy people don't do that!

I wonder what color that banana on the coffee table will be by morning.

By popular demand:

"Chocolate Sandwich Cookies with Vanilla-Cream Filling"

Chocolate Wafers:
1 ¼ c. flour
½ c. cocoa
1 tsp baking soda
¼ tsp baking powder
¼ tsp salt
1 ½ c. sugar
½ c. plus 2 Tbl butter at room temp
1 large egg
Vanilla-Cream Filling:
¼ c. butter at room temp
¼ c. shortening
2 cups powdered sugar
2 tsp vanilla
Scant ½ tsp salt
Preheat 375

Make wafers:
In food processor or mixer, mix all dry ingredients together until combined. While on low speed, add butter, then egg. Process or beat until dough is blended well and massed together. Mine was sticking in clumps and held together if pressed slightly. If dough is grainy from sugar, process a little longer.
Drop rounded teaspoons of dough onto nonstick or parchment lined sheets at 2 inch internals. With moistened fingers, round out the cookies and flatten them a little. Bake for 9 minutes, turning pans once for even baking. Cool cookies on a rack. Now, I actually cook the cookies for less. If you really do teaspoon fulls, I’d bake them for 6 minutes. If you want truly crunchy cookies, cook the full 9, but I like a little chew in the center.
Make the vanilla-cream: Put the butter and shortening in a mixing bowl and at low speed, gradually beat in the powdered sugar and vanilla until blended. Turn the mixer up to high and beat for 2-3 minutes until fluffy.
With a pastry bag (or a plastic Ziploc with the corner cut off) fill the cookies.


Lindsey said...

You're awesome.

Lindsey said...

p.s. This was for my benefit, right? Maybe I'd feel better if everyone of my favorite bloggers posted a picture of their living room. :)

I posted about my kitchen one time. It was liberating.

compulsive writer said...

How much exactly is a rounded teaspoonful?

And another reason to bake homemade Oreo cookies (of course I don't because I am admittedly lazy and they are so good I would actually eat the entire batch before the weekend) is because they actually taste good.

Hmmm. I wonder how they'd be in a pumpkin-oreo shake?

Azúcar said...

A rounded teaspoon is this much. You take the teaspoon, scoop the batter until it looks like this. Then you drop it in the pan.

Not just you Linds, I know there are others out there that sometimes feel inadequate including me. Let's be honest, we only see what the blogger allows us to see.

In unrelated news, I forgot to take out my contacts last night. I hate that feeling. *dry blink*

Engineer: martha corinna; Conductor: j. bradley; Restless Riders: norah corinna, lucia louise, j. abram; On the Caboose: tequila the foxdog said...

I know all about the avoiding certain blogs b/c they make me feel bad.

Suzie1 said...

Oh how I do love those homemade Oreos! I make those for people I want to do things for me.

It works every time.

RC Cola! said...

I think it was for my benefit as well -yay!

Homemade Oreos are a zillion times better than the store bought kind, you sexy mama!

Rynell said...

Homemade Oreos = Yum-o-rama.
(and well worth household neglect)

RC Cola! said...

I have to say, my bff just started a blog, and I so appreciate her showing all sides of motherhood -not just the pearly pretty ones.

Check this out!

more caffeine, please said...

I'm going right now to tie my kids to their beds so I can make homemade Oreos.

Marie said...

I am a crafty person... I just do it in my PJ's. On my blog, there are more pictures of my kids in their PJ's than not.

OOOH, and those Oreos. Did you post the recipe and I just didn't see it? And I have never thought of One big giant Oreo, just for me.

Mo Jo's Weekly Update said...

Hey, I was driving down Lincoln Park in Chicago and I saw a store called Cake Girls. I thought of you. You should google them and check them out. I saw cakes made to look like designer purses. I was too lazy to google them because I already drove past there delicious lookin' store.

Laquina said...

Ummm...please look at this. Freshmen year friend, kind of.

It plays music while you read their story....IT PLAYS MUSIC WHILE YOU READ THEIR STORY.

I can't......

Ashley said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Ashley said...

You are a great writer! And I long for your homemade Oreos.

Rachel said...

please post the freakin' recipe or this pregnant lady is going to suffer through an undenied craving. i love homemade oreos, but yours look way better than mine!

kiki said...

I so need some of those oreos right now!

Cindy said...

I'm going to try these! Do they taste the same as real Oreos or should you just not even think of them as Oreos, but as a distant cousin?

pflower10 said...

Do they make as good of a shake that regular oreos make??

Azúcar said...

Ashley, I'm starting with you and your lovely compliment. Welcome, and come back anytime if you're going to sling that kind of love around. I might be a good writer, but you went to law school, so you win.

Chi--if they'd survive the mail, I'd send some your way.

Cindy Mindy Pindy - Cousins, because they taste better (I modified some ingredients, just trust me.)

Peef--They aren't going to last long enough to make it to shakes, but I don't think the filling will go hard enough.

Marie-- Hi! Did you see I posted it just for you?

MCP - How do you think I got them done?

Azúcar said...

La Quina, why didn't I think of doing something like that? It's a good thing we're collecting these ideas for your nuptials to be.

RC: Your BFF has me hooked.

Rynell: I think that anything else is worth household neglect. I think that's my problem.

Kiki: Well? It's not like you're five states away anymore. Use The Secret.

MoJo: Are you rubbing it in my face that you live in Chicago? Yeah, that's what I thought.

Azúcar said...

Last update of the night:
My tummy hurts from eating too many Oreos and my living room looks almost exactly the same. Go team.

b. said...

Homemade Oreos were the first treat I ever baked for Hoss when we were dating.....I don't know that I've made them since.

Cindy said...

Yes! Thank you! I'm going to try these up here. I've got a new internet boyfriend, so maybe when I meet him in Utah for the first time, I'll make him these!

c jane said...

Will homemade Oreos get me a new internet boyfriend? It's been too long.

Geo said...

You are hilarious.

And you saved me from a complex. Thanks.