Tuesday, September 04, 2007


We had the most amazing labor day weekend!

What can we say?

Deplaning in Rio always reminds one that one ought to have packed less luggage; what need for clothes is there really in this hot, humid, delightful metropolis? However, the allure of just one more monogrammed designer overnight bag is more than this girl can resist. Is it too much to wear my new Diane von Furstenberg wrap dress with my DVF luggage? I didn't think so.

We planned on spending most of the weekend at the beach. Plan accomplished! The soft breezes were just the respite from the sand and surf. I finished three books!

The only time we left the beach was to savor limonada suiça and lingering suppers over feijoada--I take mine with extra couve. I admit, there were a few hours spent enjoying the sounds of samba. We joined in after the sun had set, dancing into the sparkling night.

Some people think that you should go to Rio during Carnival. I don’t subscribe. Bypass the crowds and go now. Nights in Rio are loud, smelly, but enchanting. I can't think of a better way to spend a long weekend with the one you love.

OK, I can think of one better way.

How about scrubbing four colors of acrylic craft paint out of the berber carpet in four rooms, a hallway, and one little boy?
1 hour, 12 buckets of water with liquid Tide with bleach alternative, three rags, an entire outfit size 3T, a few tears shed on the periwinkle wool rug, and one trashed Calvin Klein bath mat later, the mess was almost gone.

I celebrated by using two magic erasers to wash my walls with the baby on one hip and This American Life in my ears. If I was feeling sentimental I would have compared my ordeal with the Unconditional Love episode; how the parents featured loved their children through Attachment Disorder and low-functioning Autism. However, I'm not feeling sentimental.

My life is so G-L-A-M-O-R-O-U-S.


La Yen said...

Maybe you should just torch the condo. Beat the Gilly to it.

Azúcar said...

It's getting to be ridiculous. By the way, as of this morning, all the paint is rising to the surface of the carpet. I like Monet, but I don't like that my floors look like a bad copy of Waterlilies. I might even have to rent a steam cleaner.

Emily said...

Who wants to go to Brazil, anyway?

Queen Scarlett said...

Here I am totally enjoying your image of labor day weekend...and then... he found the paints... and to think I started welling up at the violin teacher's today because my daughter has decided in the last a switch has gone off... to defy me at every chance she gets.

Will we survive? I guess the more appropriate question...will they? ;-)

ps. If I ever make it to a vacation where spanish or latina love is needed - I want you to come with...

Mrs. Dub said...

Maybe if you had El Guille throw some beads after such an incident you would feel a little less crazy and a little more Carnival.

Heaven help us all!

compulsive writer said...

It always comes back.

And so do the kids.

I don't know why, but they do.

And I'm with La Yen. Do you have good insurance?

Kalli Ko said...

I hope the glamorous exclamation at the end was a fergie shout out. Even though I think she is some kind of ridiculous and I don't understand eye brow rings. She does have a hot boyfriend. Does that cancel out?

El Guille is on the warpath. Watch out people.

more caffeine, please said...

Oh my oh my oh my. Just forget about the carpet until your kids are 10 or you sell the place. Then replace it 'cause he's on a mission and there's one more close behind him...

Sarah said...

The juxtaposition of the two scenes was cruel, indeed. But hey, that dress is fantastic!

by the way, I've just today become a food critic for a local paper! Do you have any advice for me? I don't really understand why they hired me since I can't tell cumin from curry, but hey, that's their problem. My first review is this week. Email me any gems of your hard earned knowledge! (okay, I'll ask nicely, PLEASE?)

Azúcar said...

Em - Me, I want to go. You should have all known it was a lie because my husband was a.) out of the house b.) in a foreign country c.) dancing a samba.

QS- Completely like a switch was thrown. He's so much fun, but way to smart and imaginative. Can we take that away from them for a couple years and then restore it?

Mrs. Dub - There are Mardi Gras beads on my bathroom counter right now. I kid you not, es la verdad.

CW- I just..I can't...maybe when they get to college and ask where their college fund went I can show them the pictures of this incident and the new resulting carpet.

Kalli- I hope you know, I hope you know, that it has nothing to do with her. It's personal.

MCP- One of the best posts in blogdom, ever.

Sarah - Can I have some candy first? Check yous email.

Geo said...

You know Alex Caldiero? This reminds me of a poem I saw him perform years ago. It's very simple to memorize; it starts out quietly and adoringly:

Isn't it?

Isn't it?

[Then begins a long crescendo of emphasis, the same lines repeated, until Alex, having passed through an impressive range of desperate can't-stop-himself emotions, screams the lines with a throat-ripping exasperation.]

ISN'T IT!!!!!!!!!

compulsive writer said...

OK, I can talk about it now.

I think.

Black acrylic paint (only one color, I know. Maybe a foreshadowing of a future goth period in his life?).

Splattered on the first quilt I ever made.

And hand quilted.

(Do you have any idea how long it takes to hand quilt a king-sized quilt?)

The worst part is the stuff is washable while it's still wet. If only he wouldn't have hidden it. If only he would have told me right away I probably could have gotten it out.


Rynell said...

Oh my!
Perhaps more Jackson Pollock than Monet?
Here's to a great steam cleaning!

RC Cola! said...

And people are shocked when they find out someone's been keeping their kids locked up in a cage in the basement.

I have to say, trying to picture your husband doing the samba was weirdy in my brain.

Azúcar said...

Rynell! It was a Pollock, but then I cleaned it, and the carpet is now Monet. It's a pity, because I prefer Pollock to Monet every day of the week (even Sunday.)

I do know Alex, but I know his wife better.

CW, that breaks my heart.

RC, you said it (twice.)

Ryan and Susie said...

Lovely. The magic erasers have saved me a time or two. You gotta love those babes though. Recently, Ethan used mascara to write his name in the carpet. That was a fine mess to clean up. I wouldn't call it a Monet though, more of a Picasso, really early, like age 3.

We're doing another girls weekend this fall. Sometime in late October or early November. I'll let you know.

Emily said...

Yeah, I want to go to Brazil, too.

Michelle said...

Your vacation sounded dreamy and the acrylic paints on carpet sounded like nightmare/reality!

kristenlibrarian said...

BRAZIL? JEALZIL! (that's suppose to be jealous and brazil mixed. sometimes things are funnier in my head that outside it.)

I LOVE Brazilian music. LOVE. And the language - Portuguese is so beautiful.

Must listen to so A.C. Jobim right now.

Oh that little El Guille. What a little rapscallion! Just wait until Proximo is old enough to plan stuff with EG - the fun times are just around the corner!

Holly said...

My husband was telling me about the Unconditional Love podcast maybe 20 minutes before I read your post!

Um, did it help at all?