jetsetgreen

Wednesday, May 07, 2008

Lovely Hideous

Dear El Guille,

I can’t believe this time in our lives is upon us, the time when you start giving me things that you’ve made as presents.

Dear child, I love you to the moon and back and always will. I looked you in the eye and told you that your present was amazing and it made me so happy—and it’s true, your present does make me happy!

However, your present is still ugly.

I will never tell you that to your face, of course. I prefer to have you discover my true feelings when you are 14 and decide (along with the rest of your Freshman class) to go back and read your mothers’ blog entries. For now, I will proudly look at this…tchotchke that is a hot mess of rainbow colors because, as you insisted, “You love rainbows, mama!” I do?

This weekend children all over the land will give their mothers ugly, useless presents from the heart. I think this is how we find out that you can love something ugly, because someone you love gave it to you.


What am I supposed to do with this thing?


And to my mom, sorry about that penguin plate I gave you in the sixth grade; it seemed like a good idea at the time.

20 comments:

sarah k. said...

I believe you're expected to wear it around your neck. Like the mill-stone, ya' know? I got me one that's round and painted like the earth on one side, and like our humble abode on the other, complete with driveway to the sky and "barn" a the end of the driveway. It kinda looks like a castle with a turret. But yeah, I was forced to wear it around my neck, like a fancy earth-shield.

sarah k. said...

My, he has good handwriting, btw.

Azúcar said...

Yes, his handwriting looks curiously like his teacher's.



He did sign his name himself to the bottom, but I removed it digitally.

Cari said...

I hang my "treasures" in a prominent place in the house for a couple of days and then I have a special box I call the "treasure box" (original) and I keep them forever. That way they know it is something I want to keep special forever and not get ruined. It's fun to see past gifts from my now almost grown children and reminisce on how cute and loving they were.

Michael said...

Oh, you know you love rainbows! I've seen you after rain storms before just staring out your office window. LOL This was a hilariously GREAT post. Thanks for the laughs!

Anne-Marie said...

I can't stop laughing. And, yes, one day our children will read all of our blog entries. (frightening)

more caffeine, please said...

Well, today I lucked out. CJ presented me with the gift he made at school (a bookmark with his picture on it) and then declared it was really his and it belongs hanging on his scooter. So I get to enjoy my stamped bookmark only by watching him ride the scooter. Whatever.

kiki said...

Who doesn't love a good rainbow?

kristenlibrarian said...

I agree it should be worn about the neck...but more in the fashion of an albatross than a mill-stone.

My Granny still has this awful tree with macaroni on it that my dad made 40 some years ago. That rainbow heart will haunt you for years to come.

the MomBabe said...

I would put it on ebay and see how much you can get for it. Seriously, have you seen the things they sell on ebay?

~j. said...

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

b. said...

I was thinking similarly when sissy g brought home some fugly thing from achievement days filled with nasty crap I'd never eat.....I felt really guilty about my thoughts until I read this, so thanks!

b. said...

nope, now I feel guiltier having shared my thoughts.
That's what Mother's Day does for me.

Marilyn said...

You read my mind.

Happy Mother's Day!

Cafe Johnsonia said...

I remember looking at the ugly, metallic pink, ceramic strawberry I painted for my mom when I was in sixth grade and thinking that she must really love it because it always sat out on her vanity for all to see. I had been really proud of that strawberry. Now? EW! I would smash it into a thousand pieces.

Thanks for saying what we all want to say. :) You know what I mean.

Bek said...

Jacob just gave me a big ball of playdough wrapped up in paper out of the garbage (so maybe a hidden gift of salamonilla??? If I am lucky). I don't think he expects me to do anything with it.

I have a box of these treasures too, and believe me, one day you will not believe that your child was so small and so willing to make you things (besides messes).

They are still ugly, but still. Mine hange in my closet door. :-)

Sue said...

So funny because it's SO true. Bwa ha ha ha ha ha ha

Kacy said...

I throw stuff like that away.

Jill said...

We have a filing cabinet with 4 drawers. One for each child. I let the stuff sit out for a few days, then ask the kid to put it in their file "so it doesn't get ruined."

I'm thinking of putting all their stuff into a large scrapbooks and giving it to them as wedding gifts.

Thank you so much, you just gave me an idea for what I can have my Sunbeams make for their mothers this Sunday! (Please let me know if you figure out what it's for, just in case one of the mothers asks)

Rynell said...

I sit here with a little tulle wrapped package of strong smelling (handmade from school) bath salts on my desk. I can't let them touch my skin....I'm not sure what to do with that, but the magnet my son made that has a photo of him on it..that I can use.