jetsetgreen

Thursday, June 26, 2008

More Things the Internets Have Taught Me

I pride myself in not being squeamish. Sure, artificial food colors gross me out, but really, it’s not like I have to cover my head with newspaper and chant a mantra (baby steps, baby steps, baby steps,) when faced with red 40.


All of this goes double for phobias; I don’t think I have any genuine phobias. Well, I didn’t have any phobias. As with most things (shoes, music, metastatic brain cancer,) the Internet lets you find new phobias that you didn’t know existed but you know that you must have:


German woman claims phobia of official letters

BERLIN - A German court has ruled against a woman who claimed a phobia of official letters in her appeal against authorities' decision to cut off child support benefits.

The finance court in western Rhineland-Palatinate state said Wednesday that the woman was sent a letter in May 2007 asking that she supply evidence to support continued payments for her daughter.

After she failed to respond, she was notified in July 2007 that the money was being cut off and given a month to appeal. Only in September did she reply and supply the requested documents — telling authorities, who threw out her appeal because it was too late, that she had a phobia of official correspondence. source.

You guys, I totally have that phobia! I hate opening my mail; it’s so boring, and apparently incredibly frightening. Sometimes I go weeks without opening my mail, other weeks I don’t even know where I put my mail (unconscious self-protection device?) What I thought was just sloth and laziness is actually a debilitating condition that might require years of therapy and intense introspection. I’m so excited!

13 comments:

compulsive writer said...

I have the exact same phobia, particularly if the words "amount due" are included somewhere on the document. Thank you so much for enlightening me about my condition.

Cafe Johnsonia said...

I think more studies need to be done. No--they SHOULD be done. I think we suffer from this, too. Do you think insurance would pay for some kind of therapy or offer some kind of compensation? But then again, I may not want to open any more letters from them...as they always ask us to pay more, more, more money.

Cindy said...

I'm a sufferer.

Azúcar said...

OH! I think opening correspondence from insurance companies is its own special phobia. Why, when you go to the doctor once, do you end up with 40 pieces of mail? I'm convinced that we have global warming because the insurance companies are cutting down all the trees.

Ryan and Susie said...

Sometimes you can catch me burning my "official letters" late at night in my side yard (I'm not swanky enough to have a back yard). Of course, I have to be careful because I keep attracting the transients to my yard, I believe they think I'm burning weed.

P.S. Insurance letters smell like sulfur when they burn. What do you make of that?

ClistyB said...

What About Bob's baby steps, love it!
I hate the foreshadowing doctor 'bill' that really isn't a bill and they say 'don't pay this'. Really? Why the heck are ya sending it?

Physcokity said...

I vote yes on the
Dr visit + insurance + USPS = global warming conspiracy theory

Kalli Ko said...

it's why I bought a paper shredder, nothing gives me more joy

do they have a name for my fear of answering phones??

Azúcar said...

Phonophobia?

fijiangirl said...

I am with Kalli ko. I love to shred those "official looking" documents that tell me I went to the dr. Like I didn't know that I went or what my co-pay was going to be!

Gritty Pretty said...

Ha! Me too! Couple this phobia with no sense of time or allegiance to deadlines and we've got a major problem. oddly enough i don't have this issues with work related correspondence and deadlines. huh.

and I marvel at a friend who cheerfully tears into her mail like presents on christmas morning.

kerri ann said...

I am afraid of the edges of things but I think I'd be much cooler if I were afraid of cotton balls.

Tiffany Twisted said...

i only check my mail once a month. is that bad? you're lucky if i actually open it the same week i check it.