jetsetgreen

Thursday, October 30, 2008

The Haunted Office, Part II

Just the other day I fixed myself lunch in the break room.  I don't remember what I had, but I do remember sticking my hand into the box of plastic cutlery above the micro.  From the depths of that box I pulled what can only be described as a perversion of nature:


A vampire fork.


Do they exist? Yes.  Was it altered?  No, this can only be cruel Nature's trick to allow such a beast to rise from the factory floor--it's a monster!
 AHHH!

18 comments:

April said...

Awesome! Wish I had a vampire fork! You have the best luck.

Azúcar said...

Luck or am I doomed?

jennie w. said...

I think it resembles the devils head with horns. Either way, it looks promising for you!

La Yen said...

You need to stab someone with it.

Jane @ What About Mom? said...

Hey! Who are you calling lonely?

TOWR said...

It reminded me of the fist of rock. Did you eat with it? Was it serviceable?

And I'm with Jane--Who are you calling lonely?!

Azúcar said...

Then you guys are teenagers? This is worse than I had suspected...

kiki said...

The Holy Grail of plastiware! I WANT ONE!

sarah k. said...

Rock On!!!!

compulsive writer said...

Oh I love it! I thought of you (and part I) today when I had a freaky thing happen in my office parking lot. I have a piece of Pyrex I try to keep at work to heat soup for lunch. A couple of months ago I brought it home to wash it in the dishwasher. Only when I got it in the house the bright red lid was missing. It's been bugging me and I haven't been able to use it for weeks.

Today I pulled into the parking lot--you know, the same parking lot I park in every day--and I notice something there in the dirt, right next to my car tire. It was the bright red Pyrex lid I've been misses for two months. It's a little worse for wear (tire tracks, gravel dings) but nothing a good scrubbing can't handle.

Weird, huh?

Azúcar said...

Hobgoblins. No other explanation.

martha corinna said...

Kind of looks like the hand gestures that rockers make at AC/DC concerts...not that I've ever been to an AC/DC concert.

Sue said...

ACK! I hate vampires!

Jennifer B. said...

This was a seriously needed bright spot in my morning.

I knew I had heard something about vampire forks. . .or was it vampires in Forks?

Maybe it's looking to immortalize a seemingly typical (but actually very special) spoon so they can create a new hybrid race of sporks that will bring hope and peace to the tumultuous world of plasticware.

Care to become the next Stefanie Meyer?

(Coming next spring, "Supper" by Azucar. I'd totally buy it.)

Geo said...

I think you get one more warning from the beyond before switching jobs becomes criitical.

Anonymous said...

Sugar

Olivia said...

spoooooooky.

Em said...

This is hilarious, and I love all the comments, too.

Are you a Twilight fan? Maybe it's a sign, since the movie is coming out soon. ;)