At 7:15 am I gave up and let Proximo out of my bed to start his day.
He immediately ran into El Guille’s bed—no really, collided with the side—and squealed until E.G. woke up. Then Proximo ran someplace out of view. E.G. tumbled into my bed and snuggled up to me; the two of us, reluctant greeters of morning. After a couple minutes, in sauntered Proximo, holding, what else, a giant piece of pizza with the point already eaten and the rest under great peril. I collapsed into my bed with a fit of giggles, under great peril of peals.
Yes, the jammy-clad baby had gone into the dining room and pushed a chair into the kitchen, climbed the chair, opened the box of pizza that his father left out, separated a piece, started eating his breakfast, and then decided to join us in the bed. So if anyone asks, we don’t have a baby here anymore, just a Delta Tau Chi.
Proximo’s words are multiplying and coming faster. “MMMMMM, NUMMMY” he announces whenever he eats, which is always. Who couldn’t love a boy who devours everything you make him as if it’s his last meal on earth?
He ate his way through the inauguration and threatened to start boiling shoe leather if I didn’t up the quantity of cereal, scones, apples, bananas, and everything. Meanwhile, E.G. picked each and every blueberry out of his homemade blueberry scone (sorry, Passionista, it hurt me too.) E.G. was very excited about watching Barack Obama talking right now (dear spellchecker, it’s time to add ‘Barack’ and ‘Obama.’)
“Is this happening right now? RIGHT NOW?”
“Yes. And there’s the old president, George Bush.”
“Is he old or new?”
“He’s the president right now, but you only get to be president for a little while and then a new one gets to be president. Obama is the new president.”
“You mean someone else gets your job? The job that you already had? That seems mean, mom.”
In the end, E.G. was extremely impressed with the multitude of flashing police lights of the motorcade and Proximo opened a yogurt with his teeth, ate two more scones, most of E.G.’s blueberries, and demanded chips of all assortments.
I ordered a whole elephant for roasting this weekend, just in case.