jetsetgreen

Thursday, May 14, 2009

You Know, Broken Safety Glass Looks Kind of Cool

Alright, so it’s been seven days since I last blogged. You have to realize, I’m a Very Busy and Very Important Person, with a life full of Obligations and Commitments. I can’t just drop it all to come and lay out my life for the internets.

OK, the real reason is that I have something up my sleeve that involves each and every one of you and might also create a supernova in the galaxy of awesomeness. I've been trying to figure out how to carry off the logistics of the plan, but it’s not ready yet, so you’ll just have to wait. If things go very well you may not hear about it ever. The plan may also be less exciting than I’ve led you to believe…like a white dwarf in the galaxy of awesomeness.

(Oh, astronomy jokes!)

A number of months ago I predicted that my current toddler, the former Sweetest Baby on Earth ™, would be worse than his brother at destroying my modern east side loft. Is it going to shock any of you that I was right? Proximo broke an IKEA porcelain bowl in my kitchen so I banished him to watch Kipper in the living room. While I was vacuuming the shards, Proximo came in crying. He'd shattered the glass door on the entertainment center, giving himself two tiny little cuts on his palms and a huge lateral goosebump where his forehead hit the edge. There were chunks of safety glass everywhere. I sent the boys outside with my cousin and cleaned up the lethal mess with only two small cuts dealt to me.
It should be obvious by this point that Proximo has turned two. How did my baby become such a little boy who is charming, mercurial, petulant, possessive, affectionate, demanding, expressive, and apparently just like his mother? No really, how did that happen? Is it like osmosis? That would make sense considering how velcroed he still is to me. We're still Frog and Toad. Asterix and Obelix. Dante and Virgil. Matt and Ben.
And how is El Guille? He's started t-ball, which, believe me, I don't know if I've seen a sporting event so hilarious in a dozen years. The kids don't quite understand why they should throw a ball back when they just got the ball. A number of kids (including E.G.) figured that as long as one was running bases, it just seemed more efficient and logical to go in a diagonal, straight from home to second. Other kids decided that one base wasn't quite enough and ran a home run every single time, no matter where the ball was presently located. I think there were five shortstops at one point. You really must attend a game.

Our games come complete with one Proximo who thinks that he's actually ten instead of two and therefore climbs all over the bleachers until he falls down, repeatedly, and with much anguish.

I think he's just trying to impress Hailey's girls.

14 comments:

Chief Momma said...

Two already? That last picture says mischievous all over it. Loved this post!

Kerry said...

bummer!

Geo said...

Well, good luck with your in-house white (and delightsome) dwarves.

rookie cookie said...

It would be bad news bears if something like that happened in my house. Like irrational-having-to-apologize-later beatings.

Azúcar said...

I'm considering it just one more excuse to get rid of the entertainment center completely. It's held together by duct tape and the persistent dream of my husband to own an 'entertainment center.'

the MomBabe said...

I'm right there with you. My baby's almost two and has become a holy terror.

Kais said...

I gotta hand it to you, I would be a train wreck if I actually had normal behaving children such as sweet Proximo. Mine must sense my nervous breakdown potential and kindly always maintain a terror-free environment. Or the good Lord knows I would bolt under such chaos. Either way, I am praising you right now!

Emily said...

Looking forward to the t-ball matchup, baby.

Rynell said...

Little kids sports teams always give me a great laugh. We've had soccer games filled with climbing on the goals, picking grass and running the wrong direction. Sounds like t-ball is even MORE entertaining!

Beeswax said...

Hey, Hailey's hubby Ben is my cuzzin! Did you already know that? Am I slow?

Kaerlig said...

I've seen those T-ball games. My son would sit in the outfield blowing dandelion puffs. Good luck with the house wreckage :)

Amy said...

You're right--that broken glass does look kinda cool.

Shawn said...

Oh, my gosh! You get to hang out with my sweet Hailey?

I am her Mum, you know---and I miss her tons! Give her a hug from me when next you see her. Your kids are adorable....

kiki said...

I want to go to a t-ball game.