jetsetgreen

Wednesday, March 24, 2010

I Lost My Job

OK, so I didn't actually lose my job, it wandered willfully from me to participate in some sort of contest called a "lay-off." I hope it wins whatever the prize is, maybe some sort of bowling trophy? This means that for the first time in years I don't have a daily job to go to and earn money from. The not going to something thing isn't so bad, but the not earning money thing is terrible.

See, I wasn't working for a boat. I was working for food and electricity. And to support the two times a year that I go golfing, because golfing is expensive, yo, and no longer one of my hobbies. I hereby renounce golf.

It's been exactly a week since the job went away and I took it pretty hard. I sobbed at my former office. I cried all the way home. I got out of my car and kept my sunglasses on and marched straight to my bed, where I tried to lie down but only succeeded in sitting up because of the huge pit of doom developing in my stomach. I calculated that we'd have $200 left over out of my husband's salary after paying tithing, the mortgage, and the car payment. "So I guess it's PB&Js?" Other Half said.
"PB&Js in the dark," I answered.
And then I cried some more. I didn't sleep. No, I slept even less than usual, which is driving on the edge of hallucinationville.

Some other stuff happened that day and I can't talk about it yet (Not Allowed,) just rest assured, it's just as bad, probably worse. So within 15 minutes I had a Terrible Bad Health Thing happen in the personal life and I lost my job. And I'd thought that the green french toast I made for my kids that morning would be the worst thing I'd have to endure that day.

I was supposed to go to dinner that night with my dear friends. I resolved not to say anything and just to enjoy the being together, but we started playing Whose Day was Worse? GUESS WHAT? I WON! Also, the number one killer of domestic cats is feline AIDS.

Thursday I hardly remember. Dear friends Phread and Lucky came over, fed me food, and tried to cheer me up. Noelle took me out to lunch where she narrowed her eyes, hunkered down, and helped me figure out my next move. You know, the move other than sitting on the couch in your sunglasses and crying until you hiccup while your youngest child is patting you on the arm. I think I slept that night? Not sure.


Mostly my heart was just broken.

I've been working for so many years that I don't even know how to deal with this whole thing, not to mention the anxiety of not being paid. You see, Other Half is a public school teacher. I don't have a choice about earning an income, I must to keep my babies clothed and fed. Yes, it's despicable how poorly teachers are paid. Wait, no, it's not simply despicable, it's infuriating. He loves his job, he loves the difference he makes, but loving your job and being paid a wage that can support a family are two different things. Here's where I swear at our state and its policy of paying teachers, you know, the people that educate the future people, an insultingly low wage: @#$%@#F$^$##!$. What can I say? Low teacher pay makes me stabby.

I am a writer by trade, and I know that there is freelance and contract work out there for someone with my wicked-sharp experience in web content and internet marketing. If you hear of anything, let me know, because my schedule is suddenly free. Well, it will be free just as soon as I'm done working my way through this box of Kleenex.

82 comments:

Cafe Johnsonia said...

Ugh. I'm so sorry. It is hard with one income and I totally hear the only $200 left after all the necessities are paid.

I'll be on the look-out. Bummer.

(Wanna come over? I'll listen and you can cry on my couch.)

Mona said...

See that face I am making in my little profile picture?

Throw in a shaking-fist-at-the-sky and that is how I currently look.

I'm sticking it to "The Man" for you.

And crossing my fingers.

And maybe cursing.

Chelsea said...

Orange Soda too? Man that bites. You probably feel like you're reliving the whole Ahha/Marchex/Enhance lay offs all over again. I hate getting laid off. No advice here except keep paying your tithing.

b. said...

Thanks for making me cry again!

When I went home and told Hoss he immediately started brain storming. We both are keeping our eyes peeled.

Hannah said...

i hate that Utah teachers are so under-appreciated. I am so sorry! I hope you find something amazing soon.

Stephanie said...

low teacher wages make me stabby too. but enough about me.


i am very sorry about your job. that sucks royally.

we will be thinking of you and praying you find something kickass soon.

Jane of Seagull Fountain said...

Dude. That is so terrible. I am so sorry. I wish I had contacts or something. I will ask Tom if the church is hiring awesome writers, but I think they are on a hiring freeze again. Scary times, and it sucks major that teachers, who should be are most rewarded, are not.

Shep said...

i was stunned and saddened when i heard. work just won't be the same without you. i hope that your next job comes quickly.

dm me, i still need to get you some xx. :)

TheFeministBreeder said...

Oh man, that super sucks. I'm sorry. I hope something even better comes along to make it all okay.

ClistyB said...

crap, thats upsetting.

I will now have a purpose for listening to other's conversations. To find you leads.

FoxyJ said...

Dude, that sucks. My husband's company might be hiring right now. It isn't totally writing related, but it is web-based and you can work from home. They pay well and they like people who speak more than one language. Email me if you want

(I swear this comment sounds like spam, but it's legit, I promise)

Emily said...

My grandfather taught math in high school and I remember how very little he was paid; it's always been a sore spot for me. IMO teachers should be paid much better than professional athletes BY FAR.

I am so sorry about your winning the "whose day was worse" game. That's never a good one to win. You do have a razor-sharp wit combined with stellar writing skills--I will keep my eyes and ears open for any opportunities that could work for you.

In the meantime, could I send you another box of Kleenex and change of sunglasses?

acte gratuit said...

I'm very sorry! I hope you find an awesome freelance writing gig that pays a boat-load of money. In the mean time, do you have anything awesome to sell on Craigslist? To keep the lights on?

ray-ray says said...

that sucks about the job situation.
my husband is in his 2nd year teaching HS math...so I hear you on how poorly teachers are paid. it definitley makes trying to raise family more stressful.
good luck.

Monica said...

My hubby works in the same industry and knows a lot of people. He is keeping his eyes and ears open to see who he knows that might be hiring. I'll let you know if anything turns up.

dalene said...

best wishes. of course. i have no doubt you will find something soon--you're freakin' brilliant.

loves--

cw

Kristina P. said...

Booooo for sucky loss of jobs.

I think you should watch something with The Hoff. That will cheer you right up.

Tiffany UnTwisted said...

Apparently, I need a pool boy, err, girl - even though I know you're thinking the obvious: i don't have a pool. That's perfectly ok because A) maybe I can say it's a tax deduction or B) maybe it's just cool to say i have a pool person.

give me a PC name for pool boy and i'll buy you dinner tonight instead of going on some lame date that's never going to work out anyway.

brinestone said...

Your writing is so sparkling and awesome that I read your blog even though I don't know you. I'm pickier about writing than almost everyone I know, so that's saying something (you're one of two). If you have writing samples that are half as spectacular as this, you will be re-employed in short order.

I also get periodic emails about writing and editing jobs in the area. If you're interested, I could let you know which sites send them to me so you could subscribe too.

Rynell said...

I'm so sorry. I'll email you if I hear of anything.

Kelly said...

Azucar,
I have a girlfriend who does freelance writing for parenting magazines and does it from her home in Iowa. She gets a decent amount of work I know because she is always pimping us for ideas. Want me to put you two in touch?

My email is nttagg@gmail.com

Either that or I suggest going to Dental Hygiene school they make a butt-load of money for scraping teeth. Be careful how you respond to that- I am a Hygienist : )

~j. said...

It'll be okay.


You can use my boat.

undefined said...

I'm so, so sorry. I'll keep my eyes and ears peeled.

Lara said...

Augh. I am so very sorry. I don't take these types of hits well at all...even for other people.

And as someone whose husband was a public school teacher in Utah, I totally feel your pain because my work is teaching music lessons and I would freak out every time a student had to quit.

Something WILL come along, though. Hang in there!

NatTheFatRat said...

Economy Schmeconomy! Ugh, this is horrible news, I'm so sorry. On the bright side, now you can join our super cool club, where you are super qualified but nobody seems interested. (This is apparently the worst year to graduate with a law degree, which obviously WE didn't see coming when we signed up for this garbage.) Good luck sistah, you're too smart to be unemployed for long.

Marianne & Clayton said...

Feline Aids, oh poor Debbie.

Seriously though, stabby isn't strong enough. It sometimes seems like teachers get paid crap because it's not treated as a career, it's what girls do until they get married. So no need to pay up. Durr. Ok, so maybe that's not the reason, but any which way you paint it- it sucks.

You will land on your feet in no time. If not, try law school.

Likely said...

oh man cari---azucar! that bites. I was kind of shocked to tell you the truth. Who on earth in their right mind would ever in the world let you go? idiots!

sorry. I don't know them. but I think they are crazy.

Man. I will definitely be keeping my ears open. Want to move out by me and OH can get paid decently? There's a solution.

What type of writing did you do for Orange soda? You should write for my brother's company, CALLE. I always think they need help in that department. They have these awesome websites and it looks like some high schoolers wrote up their descriptions.

dmphilips said...

So, so sucks! I work at Ancestry.com and we have a ton of job openings:
http://hotjobs.yahoo.com/job-search?kw=ancestry.com+&country=USA&x=11&y=7

Not sure what your background/experience is exactly but maybe there is something?

Good luck!

rookie cookie said...

I hate this.

I am not going to tell you that I know how you feel, because I don't.

But I just hate this.

And take advantage of Cafe. Go to her house and have her make you some food.

jennie w. said...

So, so sorry to hear about the job and the mystery "bad thing". I'll keep you in my prayers. Any chance you want to move to Austin? There are lots of jobs down here.

Kalli Ko said...

BLOWS

I've sang a similar song.

Pray for miracles and they will happen. Cheesy. But true.

Emily M. said...

You've been on my mind and in my prayers. You are witty, kind, and a fabulous writer, and we are all pulling for you. Blessings.

Hil said...

Ahh! No! I'm so sorry. You will be in my prayers... something great will come along, you just wait and see. Until then.. chocolate is always my crutch during times like these.

Hailey said...

Not awesome things like this should never happen to an awesome person like you. I'm totally bummed for you and hope it just means there's something better out there. In the meantime, rock band parties?

Andrea said...

http://healthequity.iapplicants.com/ViewJob-70127.html

Sarah said...

Ugh. That stinks royally!
Hope you find something soon.
I wish teachers were paid as much as they are worth -- you know, they do teach those overly paid doctors and lawyers. Without those teachers they would be stupid.

amelia said...

OH CARINA. I am thinking of you. My dad went down this path many times when we were growing up. Things will be OK.

Sarah said...

Want a chocolate souffle? I was thinking of making one anyway.

noelle said...

i was wondering when this post would be posted.

you handled it much better than you give yourself credit for, although i don't think the shock has worn off for anybody. you know what i think and who i think it about...best to leave it at that, yes?

i've got my eyes and ears peeled for you...

the emily said...

I lost my job right after graduating from college, just as husband and I were building a house. We had to back out, it was embarrassing and terrible. Nothing worse. So sorry.

My husband works for the state, and, well, we can't make ends meet. He has a masters degree and makes less than $40k. so this google job I had saved our family's bacon for a year (it's just a temporary job so it was over after a year): http://www.google.com/support/jobs/bin/answer.py?answer=118299&query=ads+quality+rater&topic=&type=ads+quality+rater

It paid $15/hr. and you could work as much or as little as you want, between 10 and 30 hours a week, at home, whenever you have time. It was awesome. Email me if you want more info. It could be just what you need in your interim between jobs.

unothinkmybrain@hotmail

Lucky ♥ Holly said...

Am so sorry.

The sun will come out.

x
H

TheOneTrueSue said...

I'm glad you came outta the closet so your legions of fans can give you a little support and maybe spread the word that a super talented product manager just came on the market. I'm so sorry. It WILL be o.k. XOXO

Vanessa said...

Oh Carina...

Can I bring you cheese & olives from Caputos?

It would make me feel like I helped an itsy bit.

You are fabulous, WE all know it, I hope you know it too. You will get something, you will, you are amazing.

-vanessa from inevergrewup.net

Michelle said...

I'll be looking for something...

and I'm so very, very sorry.

L& J said...

I don't know you, but i love your writing. You've got talent and I'm sure you'll find something soon.

As a side note-- i was laid off from my job about 2 years ago. I was devestated. I took a administrative assistant job at a treatment center for teens-- just for the money. I was constantly searching and searching for a job in law-- like i had before. I interviewd a couple of times, but nothing. This went on for a year! But, then once i got more involved in the work at the treatment center I began to love it! Even more than I ever loved legal work. And it changed the course of my career forever. I'm so thankful for that hard year. Even though it was frustrating and I felt like a failure, what I didn't realize at the time was that it was a huge blessing in disguise! And the big guy upstairs knew what he was doing. So, you never know what could lay in store for you!

craftyashley said...

Sorry to hear it! I wish you could all move down here and I could pay you to write fun stuff JUST FOR ME!

Here's to hoping something awesome lands on your doorstep!

Michelle said...

I hate that anyone has to go through a job loss- it just sucks. I just know that someone will snatch you up quick, you're too talented to be left unnoticed. Good Luck Carina!

Geo said...

Prayers, midnight trains, love, and terrific confidence in you. I will be looking around for someplace smart enough to put you to work doing what you do best and solvent enough to compensate you fatly for your mega-brilliance. I love you. I'm so sorry you're facing such a time.

Bryn said...

So sorry. My husband was out of work for 2 years a couple of years ago. Financial stress really sucks. I hear you on the teacher's salaries. That is one of my soapboxes since I have a teaching degree. The pay is despicable! I feel like teaching is a service project when you recognize how pitifully you are paid and how much is required! You are a clever writer! You did a great job with this post! I wish I could make it all better now for you but I can't. And I don't know how long the stress will last but I can't imagine it lasting forever. It is just a matter of when you find another job! It is just a matter of WHEN, it WILL happen!

JMadd said...

The same thing happened to me a year ago... I had just returned to the office after a medical leave from an ectopic pregnancy and I was laid off that day. It was devastating. It sucked big time. But things are OK now. Things will always work out, even when you don't know how they possibly can.

Mindy Gledhill said...

Come work for Element SEO. And if not, write my web content and press release for me?

Mindy Gledhill said...

P.S. I'm sorry that you're feeling so crummy. I hate that feeling. Can I offer this one consolation? Some of what seemed to be the greatest times of loss in my life have turned out to be nature's way of opening up space in my life for greater opportunities. There are some really amazing things in store for you.

Kais said...

I cried for you last week. I did. I had left a dumb Shamrock Cake Pop on your desk, saw you standing at T's office door and wondered why you hadn't smiled and said "hi". I didn't find out that day, but I did on Friday. I couldn't believe it. Still can't! I'm so sorry, Corina! You are one of the most talented and sharp people I know - you will find something even better soon. I have no doubt. You're in my prayers. Hugs.

The Rookie said...

Teacher pay (is that an oxymoron?) leaves me feeling more than stabby.

But onto you. Not to sound trite, but: Thisjustplainsucks and I'msosorry. Uncertainty is haunting. I'm praying and hoping something even better is just around the bend for you, that this worry doesn't last for long.

Kami said...

I hate that this all happened to you in the same day. I agree with Mindy...good things will come I just know it. You should go to work for her!

Becky said...

i am so so sorry. i hate layoffs more than anything. it's the worst possibly feeling to those it happens to.

I got laid off last January and it blew...time will heal. i hope you find something you love and makes you happy! in the meantime, I'll keep my eyes out.

you need a cupcake! a dang good one too!

Mrs JP Chaos said...

I'm so sorry.

If I lived closer, I'd share my princess tissues with you.

DrJudd said...

I know you'll find something better. It sucks, but there's life after OS too. Good luck in your job search, I'll keep my ears open. You're too smart to be jobless long.

Miggy said...

I'm sorry C. That SUCKS. And because I know your bosses, I'm really interested in the details of the situation because I'm thinking if they're letting YOU go, things must be bad. Or they're stupid. Both are totally possible.

Hugs and well wishes.

Vern said...

Yes, but you WON THE WORST DAY EVER CONTEST!! Let's focus on the positive.

lisa said...

I'm with Vern...

Seriously though, you are wicked funny and talented! There is no possible way this can last for long!

We'll keep our eyes open too!

thedoodlegirl said...

WHA??? SERIOUSLY???? I am SO SORRY!!! YOU are truly, truly amazing and talented. I KNOW things will get better! LOVE YOU!!!!

liz said...

:-(

GrittyPretty said...

dear azucar,
i'm so sorry and am quite stunned at this news. you are fabulous. your writing is genius. my wish is that your next job will be even more satisfying and pay better and give you more free time too! and that your future work meetings with colleagues will be on golf courses. =)
best wishes!!
quel

Jennifer B. said...

That really, really, really, stinks.

I'm so sorry!

Carrot Jello said...

http://provo.craigslist.org/search/wri?query=+

That's all I got.

fijiangirl said...

O.K. Miggy you made me laugh because both could be totally true! I am so sorry to hear it. Not that this would make you feel any better but 90% of our income was cut when Peni was laid off in December... well it is now the end of March and we are still surviving it. All I have to say is eventually things WILL work our and I know we are doing so well under the circumstances because we paid our tithing.

If I hear of anything I'll let you know. You are amazing.

BTW... I gave a shout out to you on my latest post... you should check it out.

Morgan Moore said...

You have wicked mads skilz. You'll be back to work in no time.

Anna M said...

Freelance ROCKS! I write when my kids are in bed because I can't go to sleep before midnight anyway. And I get paid about 5 times more than I did when I was at a desk job. Put out your feelers, the jobs will come.

Plus, I know my husband is always hiring freelance writers (although he can't hire me--boo!) for work at Omniture/Adobe. I think he even follows you on Twitter (aljmac). Hit him up, he's awesome.

Good luck.

Adria said...

I'm sorry to hear this. It really stinks. I think you're hilarious and a brilliant writer. I hope you find something soon, and you're other stuff is manageable and short lived.

Barb @ getupandplay said...

Oh, this is awful. I am so so sorry.

Linda said...

You don't know me but I admire your writing and always enjoy your posts and am so sorry you were laid off.

A couple of observations:
1. you are obviously very talented and I'm sure that great and well-paid freelance opportunities will come your way
2. do take some time for yourself while you hunt for work, spoil yourself even if you don't have the cash to go out and do spendy things there is a lot to be said for just taking a breather

Your son patting you on the arm while you hiccup is such a sweet image - family matters.

Tamsin said...

It's hard to know what to say other than "sorry your job ran out of money". That really bites the big one, but I'm confident that a talented woman like you won't stay unemployed for long. Not if they know what's good for them!

Mrs. Potts said...

So I'm five days late in reading this post, but I hope you know my sympathy and prayers are just as sincerely headed your way. I will keep my eyes out for you.

sharpasatack said...

Okay, I've never even been to your blog before. Ever. And you know what? I lost my dream job in November. Sudden lay-off, no warning, shock and awe.
I cried when it happened, I cried while cleaning out my desk, I cried the whole way home, I cried for a week in my bed surrounded by cookie magazines. I still cry when I think about it too much.
I have no words of wisdom...just wanted you to know that you're not alone.
(Also, both of my parents were public school teachers. Boy oh boy, do I feel your pain.)

Olivia said...

So sorry about this Carina! Maybe I can get you an awesome job here in NYC. Are you up for a move?

martha corinna said...

Whenever I've needed a pick me up I can always turn to your blog because honestly, your's is my favorite. Not that that helps you with your current situation, but, you know.

I also wanted to tell you that one of the reasons I love you is that my father was a public school teacher all through my formative years. I am the oldest of 8. He was also the girls tennis coach, I think that payed like a thousand dollars or something ridiculous. Anyway, my mother always, always had to work, and she worked hard, not because she drove a nice car or because she dressed fancy or even ever had her hair done, but because she had to. I watched her sacrifice a lot. I wanted you to know that I've always had a lot of respect for you (even though I only know you through your stories). But I appreciate your families sacrifice. Good public school teachers kick A.

martha corinna said...

OK, I know your family is plural and its sacrifice is plural, but whatever.

Momoko Photography said...

That makes me want to punch someone. I know how you feel about teachers, because if you may or may not remember, Josh taught in Utah. It's sick what they pay the teachers in Utah, totally despicable. You could get pregnant off of insurance and move to Chicago to a one bedroom studio basement apartment for a job equal the pay of what Utah teachers get. That's how we showed the education system in Utah.

marshall p said...

i'm sorry for your loss!

Anne-Marie said...

That is a hard blow. I'm so sorry, but you are one talented chick and someone is bound to snatch you up.

Nishant said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.