Wednesday, April 28, 2010

Things I Want to Do This Week Before I Start Working Again

1. Build a dining room table (not a "dinning" room table, because that isn't a thing, Internet.)

2. Spend the weekend in Seattle but not have to drive there.

3. Take my kids to see a movie in the middle of the day just because.

4. No, but seriously, plant the seeds in the starter pots or that trip to the greenhouse was just a lost afternoon.

5. Volunteer in EG's classroom.

6. Reorganize my downstairs desk.

7. Organize my upstairs desk.

8. Clean the bathrooms, like, really clean them.

9. Not do anything.

10. Do everything!

11. Nap.

12. Celebrate my birthday!

13. Scrub poop off the play set slide (cross fingers!)

14. Start a painting.

15. Find bags full of money so I can just buy one of his paintings.

16. Would I really buy art with bags of money should I happen to stumble across them? Uh, yes. So again, find bags of money.

17. Be nice and smile at the neighborhood kids even when I know they've been mean to my kid.

18. Sew drapes!

19. Put away the sewing machine.

20. Finish re-fashioning those shirts I bought at Savers into a dress and then put away the sewing machine.

21. Re-do entire front yard. I'll need to wait on this one (foreshadowing bullet point!)

22. Keep doing Pilates even though I feel like I've been kicked by hobos.

23. Use the word "hobos" more!

24. Turn off the buzzer setting on the dryer because it freaks me out late at night.

25. Make fetch happen.

Oh, I didn't tell you I got a new job? Well I did. I gotta job.

(Say that like Positive K's I Got A Man. )



Mrs. Organic said...

New job and a birthday, what more does this week need?


Anne-Marie said...

Wow-That's a big list Mama!
Good luck with that. I'd start with the poo scraping, personally and work your way up.

yahoo for the job! i knew someone would snatch you up.

Sister Pottymouth said...

Suh-weet! Congratulations on the job!

Sorry I can't make it to the birthday thing. I hope you have a fabulous time.

BTW, I just linked to your fundraiser post. I hope that's okay.

Barb @ getupandplay said...

Congrats on the new job! Wonderful news! And a very happy birthday to you! I haven't planted my seeds yet either and kinda thought it was too late- I'm glad it isn't yet!

NatTheFatRat said...

On behalf of all former editors in America I want to thank you for #1.

(Happy Barthday, you fancy thing.)

The redhead said...

Totally with you on the whole hobos thing. Hobos!

b. said...

Atta Girl!

Susan said...

i'll jump on the fetch train. i've needed something lately to focus on, i've been so bored...

~j. said...

Whutcho' job gotta do wit me?

Britty said...

Very worthy goals, Azucar. And p.s., I know "I Got a Man" word for word. Congrats on the new job - I knew it wouldn't be long.

Layla said...

I really love this list, especially number 9. Congrats on the job!

Likely said...

whoopity woop!!!! way to go!

I say kick the pilates to the curb, don your orange leotard and jog around the city and let guys hit on and rap to you.

"your man's a headache, I'll be your aspirin" -- I forgot how hilarious that song is. early nineties rap/hip hop is fo' real.

Likely said...

hopping back to say that I plugged in I Got a Man as a new station into Pandora because it was so fun to hear again. It popped out Jump - Kris Kross, Tennessee, Cool like dat, Come Baby Come --- awesome. I have my yellow leotard on.

Keri Beth Mason said...

Love the list! Yay for the job!

Kelly said...

Glad you got a job. Hated that video though....

piper. said...

make fetch happen! i'm moving that to the top of my own list.

Joann Mannix said...

Is this a congratulations? Because if it is, CONGRATULATIONS!

Also, my college girl's favorite word is hobos. I thought that word disappeared around the 70's, but clearly with you and my girl spreading the word, hobos will be all the rage. I like it better than some of the PC words. It speaks of railroad cars and patchy clothes. Do people patch anymore? Instead of slumped on the sidewalk, oozing of cheap booze with a hand splayed open. I mean, why not glamorize the homeless? Everyone likes to be gussied up a bit.

(Man, I hope you don't have the haters like your friend does. Otherwise, I'm in BIG trouble.

By the way, my word verification was the oddest word I have ever heard in my life. Pupersit. That just reeks of gross.

Azúcar said...

Joann, that really does reek of gross. So does the unidentifiable yellow-ish liquid I found this morning ON TOP of the garbage bag. What was it??
(And I actually do patch, my 6YO tears the knees out of every pair of his pants.)

Oh Kelly! That was a 90s kiss just for you. The 90s are sad you rejected them.

Likely, You know it. Also on the playlist: No Diggity and I Wish.

Azúcar said...

Thanks for the congratulations, kids, it means a lot coming from the Internets like that.

And for all of you who are joining me in this quixotic desire to make fetch happen, I thank you.

Britty, why am I not surprised?

Layla, don't tell, but it's my favorite, too.

La Yen said...

Is your job as a weathergirl? Because I know your breasts can tell when it is raining 90% of the time...

Katy said...

ahhhh hahahahahaha, make fetch happen. That took me a second to get that, but it's GOLD! Great blog.

Mary said...

Oh my goodness... Marry me. The "dinning table" thing makes me want to stab someone.

And I'm not really that much of a spelling snob. Dinning just completely sends me over the edge.

Mary said...

Okay, I know I already posted, and I already even proposed, but I'm back and I want you to have my babies.

The Nutella commercials?! Seriously, what the heck?

ALSO, Two and a Half men is the stupidest thing I've ever seen, and Charlie Sheen makes me want to scrub myself till I bleed.

Your new frightening blog stalker

Azúcar said...

I heard you can catch the clap just from watching Charlie Sheen on the TV.

Beeswax said...

A job? So soon? At least you get your birthday off?

My kids say hobo all the time. I kept trying to tell them the pc term was homeless person. But if you are okay with it...I'll encourage the hoboisms

Kami said...


Sarah said...

Congrats on the job.
But how the heck is there poop on your slide? Or is it bird poop? That would make sense.

Azúcar said...

Here's how:

1. Start potty training your 3YO.
2. At some point, that 3YO will go into the backyard, remove his pants, poop a little, and when sliding down the slide, will schmear a straight line of poop all the way down.

So that's how.

Jennifer B. said...

Happy Birthday and congratulations! Hoping you steer clear of hobos this week.

The Rookie said...

That is so fetch! Happy Birthday and congrats on the new job!

Angie said...

read your post over at cjane and guffawed loudly-thanks, I totally needed that today

Damaris said...

congrats on your new job. I like your post over at Cjane but I like this one more. As a SAHM I am all for not being a SAHM.

kashurst said...

Hobos! umm...good luck with your sounds a lot like mine...I should probably get going on that...

Andrea said...

I am totally with you and Mary. I think that if you make a living off your blog, you should be required to know how to spell "dining".

Janine said...

You are very funny...thanks!

Marianne & Clayton said...

Gretchen, it's not going to happen.

Carrot Jello said...

I think my subconscious knows you want to come to Seattle, because last night I had a dream that you came over to my house.
I spent the whole dream looking for ingredients to make hot chocolate for you, while you sat in my front room.
I went through every cupboard and closet in my house.
It took hours.
(I need to clean out my dream cupboards, btw. They're very messy. Is that symbolic, or what?)
Finally, I found a very old, cutesy snowman made out of a lollipop and sandwich bags that had hot chocolate mix and sprinkles as his body.
So then I wondered if I should just give up looking and make you hot chocolate with sprinkles, but I didn't know if you would like it.
So now I'm wondering, do you like hot chocolate with sprinkles?
You know, in case you ever come over and want some.

Jennifer said...

De-lurking to say "Congratulations" and you rock! I love your writing.

Kais said...

Hobos! Congrats on the job....congrats on the list (best wishes) and HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!! Live it up!