jetsetgreen

Wednesday, May 19, 2010

Woman! Parts! Scary!

I was talking to a friend today. She's a midwife. We were talking about midwifey-womanish things: panty-liners, curling irons, squealing, and how much we like the color pink.


The topic of IUDs came up. You know, intrauterine devices, a very small object placed in a woman's uterus that stops that uterus from growing a baby. Since she's a midwife, she installs and removes them all the time. She jokingly asked if someday I'd like to keep an IUD and scrapbook it.

"Uh, what?" I asked, "You can't be serious."

And with that she sighed and said, "Yes. I've had women ask to keep the removed IUD so they could scrapbook it."

AND THEN MY HEAD EXPLODED, INTERNET.









If you want to you can go read a thing I wrote for Vanessa's blog about how nursing my first child was very hard, how I cried, and then it changed my life. Be warned, male readers, I write about nursing over there, which may or may not be appropriate for your delicate lily eyes.






37 comments:

Emily said...

Seriously?!?! You have to be kidding me!

Kelly said...

Only in Utah!

Tiffany said...

Are they vintage, handmade IUDs first purchased on etsy? Because then it totally makes sense.

jennie w. said...

Do you wash it off first, or is the "patine" desirable?

P.S. Yeah, men just can't handle boobs.

La Yen said...

Were you having a pillow fight?

dalene said...

and this is why i don't scrapbook. not at all.

p.s. good one tiffany!

cw

Megan said...

That is a devotion to scrapbooking that might signal a problem.

L. said...

WomEn? As in, plural? As in, there is more than one woman in the world whose scrapbook contains this?

I had an IUD removed once, and the doctor joked about whether I wanted to have it bronzed. Little did I know....

Adriel & Tierra Wakefield said...

I can't imagine why anyone would want to keep one just for memories. The memories of my IUD were lots of cramps and periods that were twice as long as they used to be. When they took mine out I didn't even look at it for fear of what was hitching a ride out of my uterus.

My word verification is "ovulacn." Coincidence?

Hil said...

I seriously can't think of anything to say about that little story...

I do know that it disturbed me. Greatly.

Annette Lyon said...

There are no words.

Except maybe "holy bat-crap crazy woman."

Beeswax said...

i can't think of how to respond, either. is truly unbelievable

Shelah said...

Yeah, they can paste it in right next to the pathology slide of placenta and the baby's first poopy diaper.

Geo said...

Inconceivable!

mel said...

This just proves scrapbookers are crazy! And why I will never scrapbook!

andrea said...

ewwww.

I don't even want to think about the other things that could possible be in that scrapbook.

The redhead said...

I used to work in a scrapbooking store. GASP! I know. I really had no idea what I was getting myself into. But I swear they have a perfect product for storing said IUD. So glad that time in my life is over because I really don't want to field questions like, "Hey, do you have anything that I could keep this in. Preferrably something clear so it will be visable." (All while they are holding their IUD in my face. Nightmares tonight I tell ya.

And I thought I was gutsy for talking about my period on my blog the other day. You've got a uterus of steel girlfriend.

AzĂșcar said...

Copper, actually.

Camels East said...

Gak!

Really, I mean, REALLY. That's just so wrong it's almost right.

When I had my gallbladder removed, the surgeon asked me if I wanted to keep it. I stared at him blankly for about a solid minute before I could respond. Keep it? WHY? I politely declined the offer, then was disturbed about it for the next three days. Maybe it was the Lortab taking over my brain, but all I could think about was, "Do people really keep removed body parts?" Ew.

I'm scared of scrap bookers.

Queen Scarlett said...

Now. Now do you believe Mormons are crazy? ;-)

ali said...

scrapbooking has gone waaaay too far.

I mean, I love my IUD too (it has saved my bacon more than once) but come on.

Mindy Gledhill said...

I'm going to write a song on my keytar about this.

Sarah said...

Gross. Why do you want something that has been in your uterus for years, getting slimed constantly, then pulled out of your vagina only to be put on cute paper with little flower embellishments and a cursive writing that says, "We decided we were ready for you"?! Crazy people. Crazy.

Vanessa & Tyler said...

I am going to save mine to sell on etsy baw ha ha so funny I am.
Thanks for the link love!

Jennifer B. said...

Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha HA!

Kalli Ko said...

I knew I was forgetting something in this baby book...

stacey said...

Wow. Just wow. It is just disturbing on so many levels.

Mary said...

Ewwwwww! I'm a little sad that this was the first post of yours that I read, but I picked my jaw up off the floor and read on. Very entertaining.

Lindsey Johnson said...

Geo made me laugh.

Hilary said...

Wow. Even I am stunned.
And I am rarely stunned when it comes to womanly things or scrapbooking.
Is it better/worse then eating your placenta?

Sell...Party Of 4 said...

That is wrong. So. wrong.

um, loved your post on nursing. =)

Caroline of Salsa Pie said...

seriously? oh my good gracious alive. that is just so wrong on so many levels. my head just exploded as well. :)

Barb @ getupandplay said...

ewww

Mary said...

So that people flipping through the scrapbook can sniff the air and say, "Is someone cooking fish??"

Nast.

NestBliss said...

This is still not as freaky as eating your placenta...

wendysue said...

From one uterus of copper to another. . .seriously? I guess I should've had mine engraved before they placed it.

Ashlee @ I'm Topsy Turvy said...

WOW... That's all there is to say about THAT.