Friday, July 16, 2010

Date My Friend: Tiffany Edition

Once upon a time I met a girl when I was attending university. She and I met in a computer lab, and we've basically spent the rest of our lives in the professional equivalent of computer labs. I owe my career to her, and that's no joke.

We used to go to bookstores and hole up; reading novel after novel. We shared every book and still do. She's one of the smartest people I know, and that's saying something.

We spend hours together laughing and talking, we never run out of things to say. If it's a terrible movie, we'll see it together. Dancing, theater, opera, she's my other date.

And when I'm feeling sporty she's my girl. We watch baseball, go to football games, play softball, hit the links, love the World cup.

I know every dark little secret of hers and she knows all of mine. And we still like each other.

Seven years ago she married a guy and a couple years after that, he left. Ask me how much I like him. After that whole thing, I got my friend back.

But now? She's ready. She's ready to find someone else to date. Someone that isn't me. I mean, I'm awesome, but I'm not that kind of awesome (and I'm spoken for, step off.)

Would you like to go on a date with Tiffany? Know someone else who would? She's a good time, I'll tell you what.

Here's what you should be:
1. Awesome. Duh.
2. Employed
3. Spontaneous. Really.
4. Love life
5. Smart
6. Alternately, not be intimidated by a smart girl
7. Be OK with a girl that is successful
8. A nice person
9. Able to pass my test (number two pencils only)
10. Funny
11. A sometime book reader
12. Older than 26, younger than 46

Some things you might like to know about Tiffany:
1. She used to own an art gallery
2. She wishes she could draw, but she can't
3. She's a dancer, a really good one
4. Loves music
5. She's unfailingly generous
6. So, so smart
7. Logical, but not annoying about it
8. Wicked good golfer
9. Is always on the go
10. She speaks French
11. She grew up in Texas and when she gets angry, the twang comes back
12. Pretty blue eyes and dark brown hair
13. She's five feet tall but wears 5 inch heels
14. Takes her steak rare (See: Texas)
15. Has a great and ready laugh

Drop me a line, I can hook you up with Her Hotness.

Need another testimonial and never before seen picture? Make the clicky here.


Shelle-BlokThoughts said...

I'm spoken for also, but she's amazing enough that she'll do just fine! :)

Andy said...

I'm recently unemployed and only 25.


Azúcar said...

Andy, come now, you're not unemployed, you're working on your novel.

craftyashley said...

I have a friend in mind, but he lives and works in Seattle. Is location a problem?

Rocketgirl said...

I have the most awesome bachelor up in Seattle too... is that a deal breaker? Because he is AWESOME.

Michelle said...

I have a very nice brother who is quite single, quite the golfer and quote employed. He's 41.

Carol-Lyn said...

I'm not above Tiffany's leftovers ;)

Tiffany UnTwisted said...

(you know, since this is me and all, I'll comment for myself)

A) Andy, I'm sure Azu will kill me, but you can always call me if you don't care I could probably be your mother yet will always look like your older sister ... just write a faster novel!! I'm awesome enough to find you a publisher and get you "employed".

B) I will travel, and dangit! I was in Seattle all last week and needed a date to a wedding, but I will most definitely go back. It is my favorite west coast city.

C) I'll date brothers too, as long as they're the fun, happy, cheerful good ones, and not the dark sheep drugged out ones that everyone is trying desperately to help save by finding him a great wife!

D) Carol-Lyn -- email me what you're looking for and if I stumble across him, i will most certainly direct him to you!!! i'm not above trying to hook up another sista!

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Amy said...

We have the most awesome guy. He's a Doctor in the Air Force and just got back from tour number 2 in Afghanistan. He gets out of the military in 10 months and then will be a regular doctor. He's in his early 30s and just wants so badly to be a Dad and be settled. He was engaged four years ago to another doctor and her residency took her one way and his another and it just wasn't meant to be. He has a heart of gold. Shortly after I had twin girls (2 mos) we were going over to his house for a big BBQ and he went out and clipped flowers from his yard and put them in a vase so that the first flowers my girls ever got from a guy would be from him. He would do anything for his friends and family. He is liberal politically. Here's where he has had some trouble. He has what we joke around as a form of diarhea of the mouth. Like he has no filter when stuff is inappropriate. Like you shouldn't talk about marriage and kids on a blind date. Or maybe don't tell the new girl you like about the last girl you dated. He says whatever pops into his head and for new people it can be a turn off. But for those of us lucky enough to have stuck it out, we found that his kindness, goodness and genuine character far out weighs the stupid stuff he blurts out. We've learned to shake our heads and laugh. He does not drink at all. He is Catholic and pretty serious about being Catholic. He lives on the beach in Charleston but can travel easily all over. He just needs someone to get his quirks and love him for them. He adores kids. He's a volunteer Big Brother for Big Brothers/Big Sisters. He loves baseball and played at the college level. He is not moody ever and is honestly one of the best people I have ever known. Oh and he's cute too...totally. He'll be in Sacramento visiting us for a weekend July 27 thru 30th.

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Anonymous said...

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