jetsetgreen

Thursday, September 16, 2010

A Sudden Onset of Panic

It was 5:20 pm on a Wednesday when I arrived at my sister’s place to pick up Proximo.

“Hey,” said my sister, “Have you noticed his eye?”
“What are you talking about?”
“Look at his right eye, it’s lazy.”
“What? When did you notice it?”
“Oh, on Sunday.”
“And you just waited until NOW to tell me?” I asked her, my voice rising (mostly because I, as his mother, hadn't noticed this obvious vision emergency.)

I knelt in front of Proximo, “Hey, baby, look over there. Now look back at me.” I made him look a dozen different ways and every time the result was the same: while his left eye came right back, his right eye didn’t. I started panicking. It was already after 5:00--too late to call a doctor. By the strangest of flukes, J had taken El Guille camping with my dad for the only night that will ever happen, so I bore the brunt of this development alone.

And what an alone.

I was pretty sure that Proximo had a brain tumor pressing on his optic nerve. What else could such a sudden change in his eyesight be except cancer? I told Noelle. “No,” she answered, “That only happens to other people’s children, like your friend’s friend, that doesn’t happen to us.”
“I’m someone’s friend’s friend,” I replied, not feeling very convinced.

The absence of J’s force of logic propelled me into the Diagnosis Fear Cycle (DFC.) You know the one: type in the symptoms and start Googling. First comes WedMD, then major websites, and finally the fringe health boards. Before you know it you’ve got seventeen different diagnoses, have decided you aren’t going to let a doctor tell you what to do, and have written down the experimental treatment options with a vague curse at the FDA thrown in for good measure.

Narrow down the diagnoses to the most probable one.

Now, search your diagnosis.

I did. I found a support group on Facebook and I joined it. I nearly cried with relief at finding other moms whose children’s eyes had issues and would be patching with possible corrective surgery. I left an emotional response on the group’s page (best to handle the introductions, I’m going to be needing these ladies soon enough.) I sent out a bunch of emails to friends who I thought might help. And finally, after working through the DFC, I went to bed with Proximo in the next bedroom, clueless to his newly helpless state.

I woke up in the morning and called Bek. I told her the symptoms. She asked me far more detailed questions than any doctor would and gave me a course of action to expect. She’s good like that, her kids have had everything.

I called the doctor after Bek (of course) and they gave me an appointment a month away. A MONTH? A MONTH? We’re not supposed to have waiting lists until AFTER socialized medicine! I pushed back a little and asked if perhaps, considering his delicate three years and sudden onset, they might be able to squeeze him in earlier? Success! An appointment in a week.
That’s when we learned that Proximo has estropia with astigmatism and is farsighted. Glasses it is! Cancer it is not! Nor is it anything else really terrible, he just has to wear corrective lenses.







Turns out I had to unlike the support group. Not the right group.

Jumping the gun and all that.

But I’d already signed up (in my mind) to organize the 1K for Lazy Eye! The kids could just walk in a circle!




All photos by my sister, fotohok, who's a great kid-wrangling photog.



35 comments:

lunablue said...

The cutest! He looks like you! Congrats on coming out on top with healthy kids- good mom!

dalene said...

i've never seen anyone more adorable in a pair of glasses. dang, he's a doll!

TheOneTrueSue said...

Snort, walk in a circle...

He's so adorable.

Also, glad it wasn't cancer. Heh.

Bek said...

He is adorable. To b honest-- glasss are easier than patching. The walk in a circle line is killing me. Still.

And my kids have had everything-- so keep calling. :-).

La Yen said...

Walk in a circle hahahahahahahahahaha.

Now people will think he is smart! Or reporter for The Daily Planet.

Azúcar said...

Or that kid from Jerry Maguire.

Chelsea said...

That's exactly what happened to Michael, and that's exactly what he has. Accomodative Esotropia with Astigmatism...far sighted. Now we have to deal with bifocals though. I remember the fear of thinking he had a brain tumor (our doctor thought the same thing so that's why we had to rush to Seattle)

You should have emailed me! :)

I have a great recommendation for glasses if you need one. EasyTwist....we get four new glasses a year.

Miggy said...

So cute. And so glad it was not more serious.

Chelsea said...

By the way, they can't patch Michael because his eyes are both the same. Also, email me about vision therapy. I've heard both sides to the argument.

Amy said...

My 4yo has glasses and people always mention Jerry Maguire. He has other features, people.

craftyashley said...

Dude! My Mom just did that to me last night. She asked if I had noticed how much one of the twins was drinking. She then said, and I quote.. "You know that can mean... juvenile diabetes." So now I am webmd-ing juvenile diabetes, and have left a frantic message to greet my doctor when she walks into the office. AGH.

Andy said...

My nephew CHiP has glasses. His left eye is lazier than early 2000s-Deniro.

The redhead said...

Kiddies in glasses are so adorable, oh my.

I'm glad it wasn't something really terrible. However, when I had to get glasses at the tender age of ? (I don't really remember when), all I know is that it was the worst thing God ever let happen to me. This was my thinking back then anyway.

Azúcar said...

CraftySmashley,
Everytime one of my kids tells me they're thirsty I panic and decide they have juvenile diabetes.

Bryn said...

Ah DFC! Been there done that and will surely do it again sometime! Probably the next time my kid asks for a drink! Hmm what could be the cause of that?
Anyways, glad to know the name!
Knowing the name always helps you know! Clears it all up!!
Great post! Especially the circle part!

Erin O. said...

"They can just walk in a circle!"

Save me a seat in hell, Carina. :)

Azúcar said...

Hey, it's my kid, I get to make the jokes.

ktb said...

And oh was it a good joke. Still chuckling!

Hilary said...

Imagine being a nurse with all that kind of information floating in this noggin of mine.
If you'd called me, I would have told you patch the regular eye to get the lazy one stronger, because I am very smart like that. :)

acte gratuit said...

Laughing out loud! And yes, he looks ADORABLE!

Amy said...

My middle daughter has it only when she looks up...then her left eye rolls to the left and her right eye rolls to the right. This is all fine until she's in big trouble and you are trying to keep a serious face and then she looks up at you with this hangdog expression and her eyes roll. It is so very hard to keep a straight face after that.

fijiangirl said...

He is wayyy adorable!

Kalli Ko said...

google is my worst enemy

and yeah on the juvenile diabetes thing

my kid intakes 90% of his calories through liquid, I've heard that one a time or two.

that boy is darling

ali said...

so, basically you follow the same process I do.

I always go straight to cancer.

(oh, and by the way, he's adorable!)

Emmie said...

My brain automatically defaults to Worst Case Scenario. And google makes it worse.

Proximo is ADORABLE.

noelle said...

The day before we left for California my mom read my blog post about Miller peeing out of his diapers and since my brother actually DOES have juvenile diabetes she started the conversation with, "I don't mean to scare you..." which of course completely scared me. We went to the Dr's that afternoon - no diabetes. See? I told you.e

MediocreMama said...

I have a soft spot in my heart for three year old boys with glasses...my little Lennon has the same condition as Proximo. And he too looks awesome in glasses as well.

But then there was the time my husband decided to tell the story of Lennon and his "google eye" (his words) to a mixed group of strangers only to find out later that one of his listeners had a lazy eye of his own...how he didn't realize this, I may never know.

Now THAT guy's mom should've gotten him glasses 30 years ago. We're ahead of the game.

Queen Scarlett said...

DUDE... we are saving our kids from looking like Shaq. Mine has strabismus with farsightedness... on and a gigantic cast. Sometimes it does suck to be a kid. Good thing they are blessed with extra sides of adorable genes.

Anne-Marie said...

I cannot stand how cute little boys look in glasses. They instantly seem sweeter and less precocious.
I should get a pair for Lucas

Petit Elefant said...

Like the 5k for Lupus wherein Viktor imagines everyone wheeling down the hill in our wheelchairs.

Jerk.

christian@dontdodumbthings.com said...

He looks cute with those glasses. My niece had a lazy eye for a while and it was so cute and endearing.

1k. Lol. 1k charity races are the way of future.

i i eee said...

Having vision problems can be a pain, but oh gosh darn he's adorable in those glasses.

bernthis said...

omg, is he yummy or what? I want to organize 1k for Lazy eye if you organize one for relentess canker sores

Elisabeth@YCCII said...

Um, do you still have the link to that Facebook group? Not cancer, thank goodness, but we patch with glasses and will need surgery. It would be nice to connect to other mothers and children doing the same. Thanks!

b. said...

He is way cuter than the kid in Jerry Maguire...but he definitely had ME at hello.