jetsetgreen

Tuesday, August 09, 2011

The Toothbrush

I stopped cleaning the bathrooms, you might recall, because I'm teaching my sons to clean them. They get the bucket of cleaning tools and potions and instructions on their use. I still have to supervise and conduct the inspections. El Guille is usually OK about the initial cleaning he gets to perform, it's after he fails the first, then the second, and sometimes the third inspection that he falls apart.

Last time we had a fight over whether or not he could reach behind the toilet. I maintained that he could and he maintained that he could not. I won. I told him to use the toothbrush (from the bucket of cleaning tools) and scrub around the commode base with Comet until it was the right color. He whined and I left. That's what I do. If the protestations and whining are too much, I leave until the right changes have been affected. You can't make me stay and listen to that.

Summoned to the bathroom for the 4th inspection, I found a clean toilet base and nearly excused El Guille to go and play. "Did you use the toothbrush?"
"Yes," he answered. Something dawned on me.
"Wait...did you use the one in the bucket or your toothbrush?" He looked at me with big eyes and an apologetic face crumple, "Mine."
"What?! There is a toothbrush in the cleaning bucket! Now you need to go throw your toothbrush into the garbage!"
"OK," he said sheepishly, and when I returned I saw his toothbrush in the garbage.

That night I prompted El Guille to open his new toothbrush and get started on his oral care. I turned to Proximo to brush his teeth.
"Mama?" said Proximo.
"Yes?"
"Mama, my toothbrush tastes weird. It tastes bad."
"What?" I answered brushing more vigorously.
"It tastes bad, my toothbrush tastes bad."

And that's when it dawned on me: Inspect the brushes. El Guille's discarded toothbrush had crusts of blue at the base of the bristles. I turned Proximo's over in my hand and saw it was...yellow.

"YOU USED YOUR BROTHER'S TOOTHBRUSH TO CLEAN THE TOILET? YOU USED COMET ON YOUR BROTHER'S TOOTHBRUSH? YOU THREW AWAY YOURS KNOWING IT WAS FINE? LEAVING HIM TO USE IT? THAT'S POISONING HIM!"


I...just...

19 comments:

Anonymous said...

You let your young child use comet without supervision and you're surprised this happened? Really?

Rachel said...

Laughter, tears, dry heaves, and a shudder of the spine all in one awesomely disturbing post.

Poor, poor little Proximo.

the emily said...

That is SICK! Poor kid. I'm pretty sure my son would never again see the light if day if he did that.

the emily said...

Of day, ugh.

The Glamorous Housewife said...

Best. Post. Ever. Thanks for the morning laugh!

Thanks doll,
The Glamorous Housewife

Tamsin said...

I see anonymous is helpful as ever :)

Delirious said...

"Hello, ....Poison control? Yes, it's me again..." Yup...been there, done that. :)

Jamie @ It's a Morris Thing said...

HAHAHA, so gross but I could see my kids doing something like this.

Laura: The Sushi Snob said...

Oh...my...gosh

Please tell us the end to this story.

Cinderella said...

Augggggh - hope he was okay! Glad you caught it as soon as you did.

Miggy said...

I'm impressed he's still alive after that one....

he is still alive right?

Kim said...

Very rarely do I read a post that prompts me to read it to my husband. This was one of them.
Oh my goodness. Sounds like something my son would do.

Also, this is what you get for insisting your children be responsible and learn to clean. How DARE you?? HA!

lisa said...

You will likely...just... a lot in the next ten years or so.

I know I did.

And also, commit the number of Poison Control to heart. I did that too.;)

Jan S said...

Oh, boys. Aren't they so unique? Yes, I guess girls could fall for the "use anyones toothbrush when cleaning toilets" thing, too, but I'm pretty sure it's a higher statistic of it happening if you have boys.

I have three older sisters, 5 nieces....and 1 adorable nephew. I will never forget my sister telling me her story of taking a shower one day and saying her shampoo smelled, "off....a little weird." Then she remembered the last person in the shower....her 5 year old son. She just had the feeling she needed to ask him if he used the shampoo. Well, wouldn't ya know it? Yes, he had used that shampoo! "Did you happen to put anything into that shampoo, son?" Head down, nodding. Just so happened that he had peed into that shampoo bottle. Why? Well, he couldn't really answer that question. "He just wanted to see what it would be like."

AzĂșcar said...

Oh, Jan...

jennyonthespot said...

Oh friend. Oh mama.

La Yen said...

Of course he used his brother's. He is not THAT dumb, mom!

Luda said...

Hey, Anonymous? Yeah, you up there? It's pretty ballsy to get on the internet and critique someone's parenting skills.

Oh wait, you posted ANONYMOUSLY. Compliment rescinded.

Momoko Photography said...

Ahhhhhh!